Random thoughts...

There's no theme for this month's NaBloPoMo -- which means its probably going to be a long month. I'll be wrapping it up for the end of the year. It's a bad reflex but I can't help it. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I'm working hard already to figure out what happened over the past 12 months.  Did I make any progress or not? 

I'm off to assemble this month's mailing. Until I plaster it all over social media, here's a few random thoughts.



1. Today is my great-grandmother's birthday. I am named after her.  She was a powerful influence on me.

2. It's also my brother Damon's birthday.

3. My brother Moniah's birthday is in 8 days. His birthday is etched in my heart because there was a massive countdown in our household to the moment when he was born. Usually when I took care of him, I was pretending that he was mine. Needless to say, I tried very hard to spoil him to death.

I wouldn't hesitate to bash anyone's head in if they tried to hurt him, then or now. And he's a gigantic tree, at this point. He's ginormous. He's been to Iraq and back -- but that means nothing to the police. Real talk, folks. If some cop hurt him, I would find out where dude lived and I would torpedo his house. I am not lying.

4. I love love love living out of a suitcase.  I love living in hotels.  I love being on tour. 

5. I am 40% fluent in German, according to Duolingo. It was kind of a kick, to walk the streets in Berlin and understand any of what was being said around me. It's going to take some work to get conversational but for some strange reason, I"m committed.

Happy Birthday, Malcolm X

Malcolm X would have been 90 years old today. Imagine that.

Here's a timely quote:

"I think that an objective analysis of events that are taking place on this earth today points towards some type of ultimate showdown. You can call it political showdown, or even a showdown between the economic systems that exist on this earth which almost boil down along racial lines. I do believe that there will be a clash between East and West. I believe that there will ultimately be a clash between the oppressed and those that do the oppressing. I believe that there will be a clash between those who want freedom, justice and equality for everyone and those who want to continue the systems of exploitation."

Happy birthday, Emmett Till

If he hadn't been kidnapped in the dead of night and murdered by Roy Bryant and his half brother JW Milam for whistling at Mr. Bryant's wife Carolyn on a dare, Emmett Till would be 73 years old today.

It really wasn't that long ago, was it.

The nation (read: white people) couldn't believe that an all white, all male jury took less than an hour to deliver a not guilty verdict. They really couldn't believe that they weren't ever brought up on kidnapping charges. The kicker for the rest of the world was that nobody in Mississippi (read: white people) seemed to care. It was just another day, same as any other -- except it wasn't. This became the spark that started the civil rights movement. To read an account of the murder trial, click here. If you'd like to read the killer's confessions as published in the January 1956 issue of Look magazine (including letters to the editor -- some of which are straight up creepy), click here. To view the documentary The Untold Story of Emmett Louis Till, watch below.



The widow of one of the killers -- Juanita Milam -- died recently. Hm. I wonder where Mrs. Carolyn Bryant is now?

Happy Birthday, Huey P. Newton

Unbelievable but true: Huey would have been 72 years old today.  And he didn't leave this world in the 60s, either.

I have no doubt that the seemingly innocuous times we live in are raising up revolutionaries in real time. Circumstances demand it. When they aren't slaughtering us in the street for absolutely no reason whatsoever -- and getting away with it -- we are killing each other in record numbers.  Revolution belongs to the young, Huey says. In no time at all, these children will be old enough to truly fight for themselves.  I hope they can survive this mess long enough to change it for the better.

In the meantime, here is Huey in his own words in a rare interview from a non-descript jail cell. 

30 Days of Birthday: Day 4 -- Take out the garbage

30 Days of Birthday -- Day 3: My Body, My Self

I don't know what happened to me.

When I was a kid, I was full of verve. I had a ton of energy that was boundless and explosive, energy that kept me moving from the moment I leaped out of bed until I was forced to go to sleep. I didn't know it but in a way, my body was my best friend. I took care of it inadvertently but it was excellent care, nonetheless -- thanks to my father's heart attack, we ate clean for the most part -- fresh fruits and vegetables, and chicken, lots of different kinds of fish and game, usually roasted.  We weren't allowed to eat candy.  Thanks to my mother's budget, we hardly ever ate fast food. We had a swimming pool, bicycles, acres of wooded area to run through and explore with plenty of trees to climb.

(Yes, I'm from the South.)

Later in college, there was no alcohol, no hard drugs and no carcinogens of any kind.  Initially, I wasn't interested. When I got curious, I couldn't afford it because at that time my real name was Poverty McBroke-ington.  Not having money meant that I cooked for myself most of the time, so I maintained the eating habits I had when I was a kid. What I could afford was monthly facials at a deluxe spa. And plenty of sunscreen. And a decent pair of running shoes -- along with a sports bra that would keep Pancho and Lefty completely stationary.

What can I tell you? Your money follows your priorities.  I didn't realize it at the time, but the foundation had already been set in concrete from childhood. I couldn't eat garbage -- well, I could and when I did, I felt like garbage, so I stopped. I didn't know how to drive, so I rode my bike everywhere. And on a college campus that covered 3 zip codes, I put in some serious mileage every day.  Last but not least, I wore sunscreen religiously. I even wore sunscreen on cloudy days. Force of habit, I suppose. When you're constantly reinforcing good habits, the payoff is immeasurable.

By the time I got to New York City, I was really broke -- but I got a gym membership, anyway. And a bike. And lots and lots of sunscreen. I still ate at home, usually. And when I had money, I got facials.  Sometimes this routine was easy to maintain and sometimes it was very hard. But whenever I fell off, I always dusted myself off and got right back on that horse. I was so used to living this way that it felt weird to not do it.

Jump cut to here and now. I've been team natural for years but I've only made a concerted effort to grow my hair long for the past four years or so. Thanks to a skincare regimen that has included high end products, regular spa visits and sunscreen, my skin is flawless. I've been more off than on with the gym these days because I've been busy with other things but today I hit a snag: it took me 15 minutes to run a mile. Unthinkable. And therein lies the fork in the road. I can either keep eating or I can start running all over again.

Needless to say, I'm getting back on that horse. My goal is to run a mile comfortably in less than 10 minutes within a month.

What's the moral to this little story?  Good health isn't an accident -- and neither is beauty. Coco Chanel was right when she said there are no ugly women -- only lazy ones.

It's a lot of good habits, all piled up on top of each other, and it's a TON of hard work. It's the hard work of staying on that treadmill for an hour. It's the discipline of eating clean instead of popping into McDonald's.  It's getting the products and the professional treatments you need to take care of your hair, skin and nails. And it never, ever stops.

Little did I know that maintaining an eat clean/live clean regimen was my saving grace. I just thought I was too broke to live the good life when lo and behold, I was living the good life all along. I seriously wish someone had told me that being a girl was this much work, though. It'll be worth it, knowing that I'll look 28 when I'm 50.

30 days of birthday - day 1: gratitude

somehow, having some sort of a celebratory moment on the day of my birth -- june 30th! -- was never really enough.  awhile ago, i let it bleed all over the entire month, which isn't nearly as messy as it sounds -- but it can definitely be way too much fun.  the unfortunate truth is that sometimes, i have to plan my fun, just to make sure i'm getting enough of it.

my good time missive starts today, so help me jesus.

more than anything else, i am grateful to God for my life.  every single day that i wake up healthy and focused, in my right mind, overwhelmed with great ideas and the ability to make cool art is a precious gift from God that i can't take for granted.  every day is a gift.

apparently, i'm not finished yet. what's next?

black music month video #5 - ice cube and tupac!

there's a lot of birthdays out there today amongst the rich and famous and especially the infamous -- but wouldn't it be interesting to have these folks stuck together in a room for a few hours? seriously, what on earth would they talk about?

1. Neil Patrick Harris
   
2. Waylon Jennings
3. Harry Nilsson
   
4. Courteney Cox, actress
   
5. Jake Busey, Gary Busey's son
6. Lash LaRue, western actor
   
7. Mario Cuomo, former governor of New York
   
8. Andy Pettitte, Houston Astros pitcher

two names that aren't on this list are featured in this video in a live performance. i would have to have my black card revoked if i didn't say happy birthday to ice cube and tupac shakur.

what i got for my birthday

something for every day of the month, in no particular order:

1. selections from the 3 course tasting menu at MoMA's Terrace 5 with Los Angeles Brian
   
2. an ice cream maker from williams-sonoma
3. a fascinating bio on the curzon sisters
   
4. a facial at queen jane day spa
5. small, slight shopping sprees at kiehl's (musk "love" oil), h&m (a bikini) and sephora (murad's pomegranate facial peel)
   
6. creating my own blackgrrl crossword puzzle
   
7. slow but steady weight loss
   
8. a bottle of ethiopian honey wine
   
9. a moroccan oil gift package
   
10. an impromptu guitar lesson from a stranger
    
11. an afternoon of leisurely schivtzing with my permanent boyfriend at spa 88
    
12. a jillion happy birthday wishes on facebook and twitter
    
13. well-edited closets
    
14. clearing out my junk room and finding cool stuff i didn't know i had -- like a pair of never worn still in the box with tags steve madden wooden high heels. *sigh*
    
15. a movie every single day of the month (thanks, netflix!)
    
16. tickets to a musical -- The Heights
17. late night dinner at Fiorello's (a Roman cafe, ironically enough)
    
18. in boxing class, learning how to pivot and lean in when i throw a punch for maximum impact
    
19. writing a new song, every day of the month
20. learning how to fingerpick on guitar (thanks, jon!)
    
21. discounted spa treats for me and renee at jeniette
22. an air conditioner in the living room (wow.)
    
23. dim sum with the lovely lisa brown
24. watching sokhna dance with mangos at lincoln center
    
25. cocktails at dutch kills on a sunday with ralph, eric and cybel (and abe and ben)
    
26. spending a sunny saturday afternoon wandering down the coney island boardwalk
27. a surprise birthday party at covo (!!!)
28. a beautiful painting from cybel
29. a cool r. crumb book from sara jane
30. and last but not least -- a stunning halter gown from renee
    

Happy Birthday To Me!

what am i going to do today?
as little as possible.

birthday season

earlier this week, i made a birthday package for my nephew ezra and sent it to ATL right after his special day. thanks to my friend allowing me to cherry pick my way through a longbox of material that he didn't want anymore, i managed to send 19 batman comic books. and when that didn't seem like enough, i put nine 1 dollar bills in an envelope (he's 8 so i gave him one to grow on), with a little note. i was going to include a free scoop of ice cream from baskin robbins but i thought, whoa -- that wouldn't be fair to the other munchkins, his brothers and sister. so i backed off. i'll probably send something like "free ice cream scoops for everyone!" before the end of the summer. it's an auntie thing to do.

i know it seems insignificant, but that was a nice little morning, making his bundle. and it made me feel like such an aunt, when he called -- unprompted by his mother, believe it or not -- to thank me. he also thanked my friend, who is still in awe of how polite those children are on a casual ordinary day-to-day basis.

my goal is to not forget any kiddie birthday this year. so far, so good.

he doesn't want to know

heading out of town tomorrow with my friend, to celebrate his birthday. we're going to a place that neither of us has ever seen. he has absolutely no idea where we're headed. when i would offer to tell him, he would balk and demand that i stop talking. i told him to pack a toothbrush and some walking shoes -- and an appetite, of course. with any luck, we'll be back early on sunday afternoon.

this getaway is as much for me as it is for him. i need to get out of the city for awhile. i'm totally burnt out.

remarkably, everything is going spectacularly well. the guitar lessons and the guitar playing are coming on strong and so is the songwriting, i got two new cookbooks that i can't stop salivating over, the bike arrived from my friend's mother (thank you, thank you, thank you) and i had an audition today for a comedy central promo. here's the kicker: i just washed all my clothes, so i've got a whole new wardrobe.

happy birthday, daddy

my father turned 90 on saturday, march 24th. there was a formal black tie party in his honor in ATL. complete with a four course meal, old family friends, footage from family reunions past, and of course pictures. ramon and i serenaded him. nothing elaborate. just a few standards that he would have heard as a young man in the 2os and 30s. i think a lot of my not-so-distant family members were genuinely surprised that i could actually sing. at the time, i was more amused by that than annoyed but it was definitely a mixture of both.

my father grew up in the deep south -- south Georgia to be exact. interestingly enough, he made the first wave of the great migration north in the 20s and eventually the first migration south in the 70s. i don't know very many people who can make that claim.

i don't even want to think about the trouble he's seen. but believe it or not, sometimes he actually tells us about it.

just so you know that he's not hobbling around in a diaper with a drool cup around his neck and talking to himself: here he is the next morning after breakfast on his excercise bike.



the day before i got to ATL, we had this long wierd argument about debt and how he thinks it's better to pay things off over time than all at once, in one lump sum. i mean, really. he practically drew a flow chart for me over the phone. not that i needed one. i had to keep reminding myself that he was about to turn 90. he sounded like his usual self. remembers absolutely everything. still thinking everything through, still scheming. and even though he's calmed down a lot since i got work, he's still arguing with me about my future, my finances.

that's his job, i suppose. God knows he's good at it.