Friday, March 06, 2009

madison

yesterday, my friend and i met my neighbor and her dog madison. her spacious, freshly renovated and totally tricked out apartment is parallel to mine. i think she lives there with her boyfriend. i don't remember her name but i remember the dog's name because it's also my niece's name and my brother ramon's middle name and my uncle's name. (sigh.) we approached the entrance to the building simultaneously and the neighbor stepped out of the way to let us in first, which is when madison reared up, fought against her pink leash violently and went into attack mode. as we chatted with her politely, the neighbor scolded/admonished the dog all the way into the elevator, all the way into the hallway, all the way to the door of her apartment and all the way inside. the dog barked and snarled and yipped the whole time and wouldn't stop barking once it was inside. apparently madison does whatever he/she/it wants.

with two loud little dogs at the end of the hallway that sound off constantly at the slightest provocation, most days it sounds like somebody needs the frackin' dog whisperer.

my friend thought it was a cute dog, a tiny purebred black and tan yappy thing -- as it turns out, a yorkshire terrier. weren't terriers meant to herd things like sheep? as it turns out, these were bred to be ratters -- that is, they were meant to kill rats in small places. in the early 19th century, there were rat killing contests wherein the dogs competed to see who could kill the most rats. people would carry them in their pockets and set them loose as needed.

charming.

from what i've heard, we've got a ton of rats in this metropolis -- with no end in sight. maybe the mayor should give everyone a yorkie.

meeting madison was a gentle reminder that i have no intentions of ever getting a dog. don't i have enough to do without having to upend my day to zip home to walk phideaux, so my place doesn't end up smelling like a toilet, thanks to this loving and affectionate animal taking all of these strategic well-placed dumps all over the place? don't i have enough to pay for without having to hire a dog walker? isn't this city expensive enough without yet another expense?

well. maybe i'd get a dog if i live down south and i have a huge house that sits on 5 acres or something, yeah then i'll get a dog. it seems cruel to have one in my little apartment in the city.

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