it's all about "quality of life"...

when i don't have a day job, my life is so together.

i throw things away and i sort through reciepts and i streamline everything. i get really, really, really organized. i stick to a budget that's realistic and sensible. i keep a really clean apartment, because coming home to a clean place just plain ol' feels good. i have no idea why. it just does. (try it.) when a situation turns foul, home becomes a beautiful sanctuary. and there are other perks, too. i practice the piano when i wake up in the morning. i download a movie via netflix in the middle of the day. i work on my songs. i audition like crazy.

what's really bizarre is, i look great because i start almost every day with a solid work out -- and when the weather turns nice, i ride my bike everywhere. that means i stay lanky in this really righteous healthy vibrant way that makes everyone think that i'm in love or something. and i am. but that's not it, that's not why i'm glowing. i'm glowing because after the work out, i sit in that steam room until my skin turns to butter and my muscles stop going boing! i'm glowing because i always moisturize. i'm glowing because i have pre-paid facials in k-town. i'm glowing because i exfoliate every week. the kicker is, i end up wearing all the cool clothes in my closet -- fat, skinny and otherwise. every season, i tell myself wow -- i don't need new clothes. i need to stay a size 4/6.

i'm not lanky yet. i'm still shedding that desk job lard. but it is coming off, finally. and as i'm watching my midsection disappear, i realize three things:

1. why should i strap myself to a desk job? i've already got health insurance with SAG and AEA says i'm vested with a pension. let's face it -- those stats make me a working actor in anybody's book. the freelance income is just another hustle. and as i've stated previously, everyday i really am hustling...
   
2. surprise! if you're a medical copy editor, freelance work pays better than a staff position. funny thing: when i had a job, all the freelancers that would come in told me so. even my supervisor told me so! eventually, i got the hint.
3. sure, i miss the steady paycheck -- but losing this weight is a good thing. when i had a day job, there was no time for the gym. and if there was time, i was too tired to go.

sure, i'm happy now. but even when things turn crappy (and eventually, they will), there's way too much joy in my life for me to not feel buoyant. i know that the joy will keep me afloat when everything goes south.

okay. back to my guitar, another pot of lapsang souchong and adult swim.