Thursday, December 01, 2005

wonder woman wonderment

i've made enough internal readjustments in my time here to have some idea as to what to expect with any situation. what i can't anticipate, i can dodge until i get my wits about me and scheme my way around it. the problem is, the stress of the day-to-day bump and grind wears me out without my realizing it. all of a sudden, i wake up feeling like i've run out of gasoline.

i guess i could say what everyone else says -- "i'm sick of this crap" -- but it's really a matter of perspective. dealing with all of this nyc stress as a non-new yorker has forced me to grow muscles and backbone and stamina that i didn't think i had -- for better or for worse. i don't suppose i'll ever lose any of my superhero powers. it's official. i'm wonder woman.

my body seems to know what to do when i reach my limit. before i know what's going on, something in me has me staying home and drifting around in my bunny slippers sipping mexican hot chocolate and perfecting my oxtail soup recipie. now that the first snow has hit, i definitely don't want to leave the house. okay, okay, i go to church. and certain exhibits. and i make myself go to the gym every morning. i can't let my body turn to mush -- i'd be miserable if that happens. besides, i'm too cheap to buy larger-sized clothes. i'd rather lose weight and fit back into what i've already got. but i digress...

i keep shifting everything around on my netflix list absentmindedly so i'll be in the mood to watch whatever lands in my mailbox. i even know when the mailman is going to show up in the afternoon, so i won't have to go outside to send them back. technically, there's no reason for me to leave my place, unless the phone rings and it's money calling. i'm relieved that i've found a sensible way to deal with stress. thank God. it's a good life.

here's the problem: i'm a little manic about having something to show for my time when my days are this free and uncomplicated. so far, i've come up with a lot of song ideas, fleshed out quite a few, cherry-picked my way through a batch of relatively obscure standards for a cd project and * drumroll, please * kept off the 20 lbs. that i lost last summer. here's the kicker: my piano teacher says i'm making progress. so far, so good.

i figure if i'm going to end the year on a high note (no pun intended), i've got to do three things:
  1. do a cleansing/detox fast
  2. record 7 original country blues songs and 7 jazz standards
  3. organize all my reciepts
there's plenty of really great news that's blooming all over the rest of my life but all i can think about is that my baby brother is coming home from iraq for more than three weeks. wow.

1 comment:

piu piu said...

thats a great post. says everything there is to say about living in a big city. i hope u have a great vacation with your family x